On Death Row: McCormick's Fish House 4th Ave

Bad, Bad, Bad, Bad, Bad.

I hadn't been to this place in several years. Not that I had heard anything particularly unsavory about it, but there are so many great options in Seattle that I'm loathe to revisit restaurants that don't positively captivate me.

So, we made reservations, packed up the kids, and headed downtown to the Columbia Tower.

First off, the place was relatively deserted. Mind you, it's a Monday and a holiday, but that's generally not a good sign. On the other hand, I would expect stellar service, no excuses.

With two adults and two hungry young kids, we started off with Crab and Shrimp Cakes. The big hint should have been the SHRIMP in the cakes, which cheapens the dish and lends that muffled mealiness to the texture...or was that just the overzealous addition of breadcrumbs as filler. Either way, bland and pasty would describe it nicely.

The kids also wanted Fried Calamari, which is one of those consistently decent dishes everywhere you go. This was no exception. The flavor was fine, breading light and flavorful, though a bit lukewarm upon arrival.

We all ordered salmon for dinner, prepared in a variety of ways. All were decent, albeit a tad oversalted, but certainly edible with excellent fish. All the sides were somewhat lukewarm, which is again, something I wouldn't expect on an extremely slow night.

So, in a nutshell, the food is decent. What absolutely turned me OFF to this place was the SERVICE. It is the WORST.

The server was old-school, like he came from NY and was top-notch back in the 70's, decided to stick with that look (hair swept back and sprayed, matching moustache) and freeze that attitude. Well, buddy, times have changed.

My friend has severe food allergies and asked for the fish plain, with no sauces and no sides. She also asked for no dressing on her salad. Perhaps it was not communicated as effectively as possible, but no big deal, right? WRONG. This guy acted so damned PUT OUT, responding with this unbearably condescending tone. And that was just the beginning. He continued to use this patronizing attitude throughout our dinner, accompanied by this ever-so-subtle sigh.

Don't SIGH at me...ever.

You will hear me say this all the time...with restaurants, the goal is the trifecta: Food, Price and Service, with Service being the highest priority. In this case, the price was moderately high, the food mediocre and the service deplorable.

Needless to say, I did speak to the manager at the end of our meal. He apologized profusely, of course, but no amount of bribery, including the proffered gift cards for a free meal, could make me walk through those doors again.

This place sucks. Avoid it like the plague. Go to the Waterfront Seafood Grill on Pier 70 instead.